My Life Coach - Client Area

Finding Strength in your "Weakness"

Generously contributed by Dwight GoldWinde, Coach and Revolutionary Thinker

You can get Dwight's book, Courage: THE Choice that makes THE Difference, here:

www.xlibris.com/CourageTheChoiceThatMakestheDifference.html

And visit Dwight at his website, www.goldwinde.com

The following is not taken from my book
     "Courage: the Choice that makes the difference
      - your key to a thousand doors"
     buy your copy at >>>
     www.xlibris.com/CourageTheChoiceThatMakestheDifference.html.

Find strength in your "weakness"

I will often hear my friends in China say that
what they dislike about themselves is that they are "not strong."

Invariably, when I explore further,
I find that the strength they are talking about is the strength:
to not feel fear, to not feel pain, to not cry,
to not get discouraged, to not feel lazy, to not get tired,
to not feel depressed.

I find it interesting that I think of myself
as neither strong nor not strong.
Yet I have resilience that
most of my friends and colleagues admire.

I don't try to not be afraid;
I embrace my fear and tap into its energy.
I don't try not to feel pain;
I know that pain is an expression
of my aliveness and my capacity to love.
I don't try not to cry;
I welcome crying as a beautiful
and healthy expression of release.
I don't try not to get discouraged or lazy;
I try to discover what's missing in terms of
uncovering and allowing the natural passions of my life.
I don't try not to get tired;
I pay attention to what my body is trying to tell me
and make sure I get enough rest.
I don't try not to get depressed;
If I notice some depression,
I make sure I do some release processes
that allow me to tap back into my natural passion for life.

Typically, "trying not to" (at least in these cases)
results in more of the same:
more blocked fear, more buried pain, more unshed tears,
more discouragement, more laziness, more tiredness,
and more depression.

To resist these feelings is only to fight with yourself,
for one part of you to make an enemy of another part.

I am not surprised anymore when,
upon a new friend's first visit with me,
she shockingly finds herself
shedding embarrassed tears in front of me.

Typically, she sees this as weakness.
I see it as a welcome and much-needed release.

What we often call strength is killing us.
The medicine we have prescribed for ourselves
is actually a poison,
compounding the original condition.

Take some time now to ask yourself,
"How am I actually doing more damage than good
in trying to be strong?"

How might I begin to find my strength in non-trying,
and in non-resistance?

Choose courage to allow yourself to be weak.

********************************************
Have you taken my "Courage IQ" test yet?!
Go to <http://www.goldwinde.com/test1/Courage%20IQ/Courage%20IQ1.htm>
and enjoy!

Dwight, MY BOOK >>>
     "Courage: THE Choice that makes THE Difference
          --- Your Key to a Thousand Doors,"
       is NOW AVAILABLE.
       Go to >>>
              www.xlibris.com/CourageTheChoiceThatMakestheDifference.html
       To find out more about my book, go to >>>
              http//www.goldwinde.com/test1/book/my-book.htm

If you've enjoyed
     the gift of "Courage Now" from Dwight,
     you might want to consider accepting
     another gift from him:
     an hour-long, telephone,
     life-coaching session.

To get the details,
     go to www.GoldWinde.com,
     then click on "Life Coaching,"
     then click on
     "How to accept
     the gift of
     a coaching session with Dwight."

If you've enjoyed or gotten value
     from what you've just read,
     why not take LESS THAN A MINUTE
     to email me RIGHT NOW
     your email address and first name
     so that you might receive
     a FREE SUBSCRIPTION to "Courage Now"?

dwight@goldwinde.com

If you've enjoyed or gotten value
     from what you've just read,
     why not take LESS THAN A MINUTE
     to email me RIGHT NOW
     a friend's email address and first name
     so that they might receive
     a FREE SUBSCRIPTION to "Courage Now"?

dwight@goldwinde.com

It's SO EASY to give SO MUCH.

Copyright 2002 Dwight GoldWinde

"Courage may be dangerous,
     but it's the safest choice we've got." -DG

For selections authored by Dwight GoldWinde,
     permission is granted for sharing or re-distribution,
     provided that credit and copyright notice
     are retained in such duplication
     (including this notice).

"Courage Now" written and contributed by Dwight GoldWinde,
     now living in Kunming, China.

Here is the "Courage Now" Vision and Purpose:

We are the people who are spearheading
     and introducing to the world
     a profound and revolutionary understanding
     of the nature of courage
     and its fundamental role
     in creating the world that we all want.

Our goal is to empower people and ourselves,
     not only in creating the results
     we all want in our lives,
     but also to provide access to
     an ongoing sense of both peace and excitement.

We are specifically dedicated to bringing
     connection,
     adventure,
     innocence,
     playfulness,
     and romance
     to the day-to-day experience of every human being.

-J. Dwight GoldWinde-

Dwight, for a life you love,

     Dwight

Dwight GoldWinde
21-5251-1113 Shanghai (8621-5251-1113 from outside China)
www.GoldWinde.com (my web page)
206-312-0071 (voice mail and fax USA)
Dwight@GoldWinde.com (email address)

Since the distinction of courage
     plays a central role
     in the quality and results of our lives,
     I have included that distinction here
     for your continued consideration:

Courage is the will and the willingness
     to embrace and fully feel your fear
     as you take the actions and risks
     in service to
     your highest commitments and deepest desires.

Courage is created; it is chosen.
     And it is chosen in the moment.
     It is always available to you.
     It is always an open door,
          waiting for you to walk through or not.
Courage cannot be stored or built up.
It's inaccurate to say that you "have courage"
     or you "don't have courage."
It's accurate to say that you "choose courage"
     or "choose to feel safe in the moment
          rather than choose courage."

Many of us appear to choose courage when,
     in fact, the courage we choose
     is only "standing on one leg."
Almost all of us are masters
     at suppressing, denying, camouflaging,
          contracting against, and/or pushing away
          (or trying to argue away) our fear.

We do this for the deadening, anesthetic effect
     we expect it to have on our fear.
Full courage includes
     a full acknowledgment, embodiment,
     and illumination of our fear
     while we are taking the appropriate actions.
It also includes an acknowledgment and honoring
     of ourselves for choosing the courage
     -regardless of the outcome.
Courage exists independently of the outcome.

Choosing courage (or not choosing courage)
     is neither good nor bad, neither right nor wrong.
     It is simply a choice,
          with associated benefits and costs.
A life primarily oriented
     towards the choice of courage
     will give you one life
     -a life you will love.
A life primarily oriented
     towards the choice of feeling safe and secure
     will give you another life
     -a life of survival and withdrawal.
It's okay to want to feel safe and secure.
     We all want that.
But, when feeling safe and secure becomes
     your primary orientation
     (usually by default),
     then you are living a life of avoidance
     rather than a life of inspiration.

-J. Dwight GoldWinde October 24th, 1991-
Copyright 1991-2005 Dwight GoldWinde