Coaches vary widely in their approach, background, training, style and ideal client!

Some coaches are very nuts and bolts, some are very spiritual and high level.  Some coaches will excel at helping you reach specific goals, and some coaches will excel at helping you get good at reaching goals on your own!  Some coaches are pragmatic and high-level/transformative at the same time.

In my opinion (certainly biased because this is the type of coach I am!), the best coaches will help you grow in line with how you are meant to be growing.  For example, this may be a time in your life when you are learning to live in prosperity, or maybe this is a time in your life when you are learning to express your truth more often in the work arena.

Somewhat counter-intuitively, growing in your own way will help you in all of the areas of your life you’ve identified as needing improvement, even if the exact growth area seems totally unrelated.  So, for example, let’s say you want a new job, but it becomes very apparent early in your coaching that you have no idea how to organize your time effectively.  Working on your routines and discipline will end up leading directly to more satisfying career conditions.  That’s just how it works.

Here are some things to look for if you want a truly satisfying coaching experience…

Green Flags (things that are good signs that this is excellent coaching for you!)

• Your conversations with your coach are different than conversations with friends and family
• You always leave a coaching conversation with new insights, or at least thoughts to ponder, about yourself
• You feel more confident in yourself
• You feel more confident that you are moving in the right directions
• There are some significant changes in your life, some of them even challenging, but you feel well equipped to master your moments
• You feel more of how you want to feel, be that happy, fulfilled, energetic, peaceful…
• You are getting lots of new ideas of things you could do in your life
• Your relationships are moving in healthy directions, or ending if they are unhealthy
• Your coach is clearly 100% focused on you
• You have no doubt that your coach “has your back”
• You know your coaching goals/objectives and you can measure/assess your progress
• You are frequently amazed at how fast/simply things seem to be transforming for you!  (“I can’t believe how much of a difference this coaching has made for me!”)

Red Flags (signs this may not be the best coaching for you)

• Your coach seems to be giving you a lot of “advice”
• Your coach doesn’t seem to be listening to you
• It seems like nothing is changing
• You aren’t looking forward to talking to your coach
• You feel “pushed” (challenged and stimulated and expanded past your normal limits is good, feeling “pushed” into things probably isn’t!)
• You used to have great chemistry with your coach, but now it has dropped off

You may find that you find one coach that you LOVE and keep using for years.  You may find that you have a coach that works great for you for a while, then you go off on your own.  Or, you may find that different kinds of coaches work for you best at different times in your life.

To get started, do your research, and choose, 1, 2 or 3 coaches to have free sessions with.  If you feel great about the first coach you talk to, give them a try for 1-3 months!  Or, talk to a few coaches until you find someone you feel you click with.

There is no way a coach can prove to you that coaching is going to “work” for you without you giving it a try.  You have to put yourself out there a bit and be willing to take a chance!   The green flags and red flags listed above will help you assess early on if you are getting great coaching for YOU.  When you connect with a great coach for you, there will be absolutely no stopping you in life.  All of your dreams, even the ones you dared not dream, can come true.  You will be accessing your unlimited potential, living the way that you want to be living, and absolutely in love with your life!

Typical scenario:  We perform below our expectations of ourselves.

Standard reaction:  We don’t like that.  It upsets us.  We set a new expectation to do better next time.

Usual outcome:  Our performance stays the sames or gets “worse”.

Sound familiar?  Our standard reaction to behavior that is less than optimal is to encounter the behavior with negative energy, thinking (if we think at all), that our disapproval will get us better results next time.

How well has that approach worked for you?

Try this:  Meet all your thoughts, feelings, actions and “results” with approval.

If you can’t bring yourself to do that, hire a coach and find out what it means to be unconditionally friendly with yourself, and how it can transform your whole life.

Yes, it’s true, I do watch reality TV!

Much of it is contrived (yes, producers, we can tell!), yet you can still discern some very interesting human dynamics play out.

Tonight is the final reunion show of the Real Housewives of Vancouver.

There seem to be some Enneagram dynamics going on, a common one, between 8’s and 6’s.

Jody and Ronnie both seem to be 8’s.  8’s have the ability to be great protectors, but also great “bullies” towards the weak.  Mary seems to be a 6.

Given Mary’s complaints about Ronnie (you should stand by me, you should protect me), Ronnie used to fulfill the role of the protector 8, while Mary filled the role of the loyal 6 in their friendship.

When Jody came on the scene, things changed.  Jody seems to display some of the more  challenging 8 characteristics (8’s are even known as “the Challenger’s!).  She “attacks” Mary, going right for her weakest spots.

Ronnie seems to have been somewhat turned off by Mary’s “weakness”, and her perceived lack of loyalty when she dared comment on Ronnie’s drinking.  That made Jody an attractive ally to Ronnie.

Summary of my guesses of the types:

Jody, Ronnie – Type 8 – The Challenger – The Powerful, Dynamic Type:  Self-Confident, Decisive, Willful and Confrontational

Mary – Type 6 – The Loyalist – The Committed, Security (Safety)-Oriented Type: Engaging, Responsible, Anxious and Suspicious

Christina – May be Type 7 – The Enthusiast – The Busy, Fun-Loving Type: Spontaneous, Versatile, Acquisitive and Scattered

Reiko – Possibly Type 5 – The Investigator/Observer – The Intense, Cerebral Type:  Perceptive, Innovative, Secretive and Isolated – I am guessing this type because she does tend to be very observant.  She would have to be a fairly highly developed 5, however, with her love of instinctual activities such as racing.

Watch for more interesting dynamics tonight!

Mindfulness is a very important concept when it comes to coaching, and when it comes to living a conscious, fulfilled, successful life!

Enjoy this discussion with Featured Coach Jessica Reddy of www.jessicareddy.com …

[mc id=”152″ type=”audio”]My Life Coach Special Event – Mindfulness[/mc]

This is huge!

Right now you can become one of my eClients through my eCoaching program, a lifetime membership, for free!

You’ll get access to all the tools my Life Coaching and Executive coaching clients get, and 3 group coaching calls a month.

I’m really not sure how long I’ll keep this open, so be bold and join now!

Free Lifetime eCoaching Membership

This is a great list of 10 signs you may be in an emotionally abusive relationship…If you suspect it, you owe it to yourself to read this!

OK, so, it can end up being a little self-defeating to always be “working on yourself.”

There really is nothing wrong with you, you are perfect just the way you are!  A constant quest for self-development and/or enlightenment can actually get in the way of your growth.

So, if you are feeling a bit “stuck” why not try one of these backdoor methods?  I’ll expand more about why these methods work on my www.CoachMichele.com blog.

All you really need to know is intending to improve these areas of your life will bring a lot of systems into alignment such that in addition to creating something positive in your life, you’ll also be coming to greater holistic health and development as a human being.

1. Strive for a very high level of physical fitness
2. Learn to be at absolute peace around your family, immediate and extended
3. Rid yourself of your “small” addictions (using food, shopping, entertainment, etc. to modify your mood)
4. Truly organize your physical environment
5. Double your level of intimacy with your partner

Choosing just one of those items, and making it a focus in your life, will bring lasting benefits to all areas of your life!

Happy Transforming!

I learned of a very practical, yet high level, personal success and leadership workshop.  It includes excellent career exploration aspects.

You can take it in a self-directed fashion, or, you can conduct the workshop for others.

It was originally designed, by Robert White of www.pslinstitute.com, for teens…However it can be great for adults as well!

A super resource…

Ultimately, coaching is about helping people reach holistic health.

When people are at their best, they tend to perform well.

Here is a great page that summarizes 101 crucial ways to be healthy.

Some of my favs:

42. Love what you’ve got

Treat your body with respect and appreciation. Focus on what it can do, not what it can’t. Find something to celebrate, not something to criticize.

73. Embrace play

Fun, novelty, humor and joy are key sources of energy, strength and inspiration. If you’re suffering from a case of fun-deficit disorder, remedy that situation ASAP.

88. Give your best gifts

Developing and sharing them endows you with enthusiasm and energy. Neglecting or squandering them slowly kills you.

Proactively choosing health *is* revolutionary.  We need revolution.

Well, the Mommy Weight Loss Series on the Marilyn Denis show is going great!

People have really responded to the coaching aspect of the show, it’s wonderful to see coaching ideas getting national play.

Tomorrow, Friday, May 13th, is the big reveal…You’ll want to see for yourself the amazing changes the women have made!

Thanks so much for joining us!  🙂